Anxiety, negativity and your inner voice.
Anxiety thrives and feeds off negative thoughts. Negative thoughts build Anxiety over time.
Every time we think neural pathways are both forged and reinforced in our brains. When we
have those negative thoughts – ruminating about what could go wrong tomorrow, dwelling
on things we said and did in the past we fire that part of our brain. With negative thoughts
we continue to build those neural pathways – “cementing” them in. What starts off as a path,
becomes a road and grows and grows until you have a motorway that conducts that
negativity. It flows freely because that is what you are used to doing.
So am I saying “Just be positive.” Categorically not. I am saying that you need to be aware of
your thought patterns and shift them to start. What I am saying is you need to start being
positive specifically towards yourself and the way you think about yourself. I am certainly not
saying that you should be expected to be positive all the time. That you should somehow
reconcile your self with every global problem by blandly saying “All is good.” Absolutely not.
This is about how you think about you. How you think about who you are. At this level – you
have to be more positive. I explain to my clients that this does not make every problem
disappear. It will not stop external events and stressors from reaching you. But what it will do
is cut off that constant feed of negativity that is growing your Anxiety day by day.
Much has been made of toxic positivity – the health and wellness industry coming up with
generic advice that says bland statements like “Be yourself” and “Be Positive”. Of course they
are of very limited use – if it was that simple no one would have Anxiety. Let’s remember,
though, there is also toxic toxicity! Continually focussing on the negative will grow your
Anxiety like the poison tree of William Blake.
This, very specifically, is what you need to do.
Think about the way you talk to yourself in your mind – your inner voice or monologue. How
do you talk? Are you hard, tough, demanding, nasty, negative? If you drop something do you
curse at yourself? If the answer to any of these is “Yes” you are growing and feeding your
Anxiety before any of the external events in the world feed it. That internal voice is like a tap
of negativity turned on and freely flowing into your mind – building your Anxiety steadily.
If you find you talk to yourself negatively take these three mini steps:
Practical Steps:
• Recognise and hear those negative thoughts.
• Start a slight shift. “Well, I am not useless because I got up this morning, got to work,
did a work out...
• Praise yourself. “Actually I’m pretty good. I’m pretty amazing.”
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